i speak in code - heart vomit

I'm a bag of failure heaped on top of a mountain of success.

Abba carries me.
I don't carry myself.
Nor do I carry Abba.

I'm a bag of failure heaped on top of a mountain of success.

Intimacy at its finest. my brokenness.

I don't want to move out of my own accord or choose to move, or even consider my movements valid.
because if I do, I'll start to think it's good, when in reality it's reaping death unto myself.

confidence in my flesh brings me death. necrotic death.
its stench is that of dung, manure, whatever you will call a 'vomit inducing' stench.
it's abominable, repulsive...
to be honest, i abhor my confidence in my flesh that i would call it an expletive

I want to only follow 1 voice.
Only 1.
There's only joy in this 1 voice.

Abba.
The One who loves me and knows me best. 
The Consuming Fire that kills my necrotic heart, and gives me a new one. 


Brand me, Jesus.

“I must have the Savior indeed, for he is my All.  All that others have in the world and in religion and in themselves I have in thee — pleasures, riches, safety, honor, life, righteousness, holiness, wisdom, bliss, joy, gaiety and happiness . . . . If a child longs for his father, a traveller for the end of his journey, a workman to finish his work, a prisoner for liberty, an heir for the full possession of his estate, so in all these respects I cannot help longing to go home.”

Howell Harris, quoted in D. M. Lloyd-Jones, The Puritans (Edinburgh, 1987), page 300.

Longing to go home

is a post from: Ray Ortlund

My Father is the God of the Universe.

This is my beautiful niece. I met her a half an hour after she was born. If I can adore a child which is not my own, then I cannot fathom the true joy of Abba over me who created me and thought of me before I was born and is still with me right now who has set His love on me forevermore.

I take it, I want it, I cannot live without it.

Love You, Abba.

=)

I'm His Daughter :D

The Spirit himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and fellow heirs with Christ, provided we suffer with him in order that we may also be glorified with him.
For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us.
(Romans 8:16-18)

Hookers for Jesus

For he flatters himself in his own eyes
that his iniquity cannot be found out and hated.
Psalm 36:2

Abba, may this never be. Keep me tender, raw, and close to You. Amen.

Here I am humbled by your Majesty
Covered by your grace so free
Here I am, knowing I'm a sinful man
Covered by the blood of the Lamb

Now I've found the greatest love of all is mine
Since you laid down your life
The greatest sacrifice

Majesty, Majesty
Your grace has found me just as I am
Empty handed, but alive in your hands

Majesty, Majesty
Forever I am changed by your love
In the presence of your Majesty

Here I am humbled by the love that you give
Forgiven so that I can forgive
Here I stand, knowing that I'm your desire
Sanctified by glory and fire

Now I've found the greatest love of all is mine
Since you laid down your life
The greatest sacrifice